2009 was the most challenging year of my tenure at Christ the King Lutheran Church. The challenges have been national, personal, spiritual, vocational, and professional. We entered the year during the worst economical period in the U.S. since 1929. I faced a difficult surgery and recuperation with the help and support of Kathy, and I turned sixty years of age. I began re-examining my calling, my gifts and my pastoral identity. Accordingly I have begun to adjust my work for the congregation of Christ the King Church. And, I consider more intentionally the life of faith as I contemplate the meaning of life as a believer in Jesus Christ and as a pastor in the Lutheran Church.
The economic context of our work led to significant cuts in the budget due to expected downturns in revenue. However, the church council acted decisively, yet, resolutely to continue the ministries of Christ the King Church until better times and alterations in our financial parameters can be effected. The church staff has continued to work smartly with no salary increases for several years and in some cases salary cuts. I am happy for the sense of solidarity in the staff, preferring that we all have our work together than to see positions cut.
The leave-of-absence approved by council for Pastor Liebster actually has worked well for her and for the congregation. Pastor Liebster and her family are in the Netherlands where Matthias is enjoying uninterrupted research for his forthcoming commentary of Second Baruch. The boys are schooling in a very different cultural context. The family is taking advantage of the rich treasures of Holland with its historic cities, canal-laced landscapes and beautiful horticultural settings. Pastor Liebster has enjoyed the time away from pastoral duties and has had time to contemplate her vocation while caring for the family in their temporary home. Meanwhile, the congregation has saved money during this period. Pastor Liebster's work has been filled out by lay leaders and staff with additional help from Pastor Fuerst and Pastor Art Preisinger.
Members of the congregation have not experienced wide-scale layoffs, but that is no comfort for those who have lost their jobs. Life in the congregation has played its role in encouraging and strengthening those who are going through the stress of job loss, job search and adjustment to new circumstances.
Personal circumstances have made a powerful impact on me and my understanding of ministry. After two years of waiting for the day, my cardiologist announced that it was time to schedule open heart surgery for the repair of my mitral valve. I had been fortunate that I was physically strong before surgery. Pastor Liebster's leave-of-absence had already been scheduled for August 20. Time was of the essence, and surgery was scheduled for June 3 so that I would have two and a half months to recover before the work load increased in Pastor Liebster's absence. The surgery was successful, and by September I was strong enough for full-time work. The amazing results of modern heart surgery still do not occur without the trauma of the surgery itself. Consequently, the anxiety prior to and subsequent to the surgical opening of the body leads to the confrontation with finitude and mortality.
Such experiences lead to spiritual (faith) matters including the cherishing of life and the realization that life is fragile. Life's meaning cannot reside in the quantity of time but in the quality of time we live. The quality of life for me is defined increasingly by the doctrine of "justification by grace through faith." This doctrine is a philosophical and theological truth as much as it is an existential description of the life that derives its value not from what I earn or achieve but rather from the proclamation of the free gospel that declares that only God can bestow value on us human beings. That value is expressed in the sending of the Son whose message of forgiveness and reconciliation is the expression of the extent to which God will go to reveal God's devotion to humans. The resurrection is the confirmation that God has met us where the arc of time brushes against eternity. The experience of surgery and the state of vulnerability in that event awakened the consciousness of my dependence on the love of God. It also made me aware of my own need to hear the gospel.
My awareness of the vocational dimension was altered not only by the experience of surgery. It was reinforced by the fact that I reached my sixtieth birthday, an event which was as exciting as it was sobering. It is “good news” to hear from one’s cardiologist, “Go, live. You have restored health and good prospects of full life.” There was a kind of crossing the line that has led to considerations of vocation. How are we to understand our calling when we have accumulated experience, skills, memories and the added capacity to cherish life and the God who has given it, redeemed it and sanctifies it? As minister of the gospel called to office of Word and Sacrament, I am aware that the Word of God proclaimed through these gracious means brings life and the blessing of life. (And God said, “It is very good.”) Babies need blessing but so do we mature people! Children need comfort, but so do we old persons who become vulnerable to loss the older we get; and, yet, have a wondrous capacity to celebrate life the more we understand that life is a gift (grace).
Finally, my professional aspirations have been influenced by the year’s events. I have always been a “people” person. Sometimes the work of church administration; empowering ministries in congregational care, music and worship, enlarging staff, leadership development, and building projects; and the raising of funds along with the raising of stewardship awareness can draw away from those gifts and their use in the life and work of a pastor. I want to use my gifts, experience and skill to attract and involve others in the life of our community. With that I am looking consciously for the opportunity to teach more and to preach better, i.e., preach with more personal appeal to worshipers and to redouble our efforts with visitors and those living in the neighborhoods around us.
2009 was the most challenging year of time at Christ the King Church, but I suspect that 2010 will be every bit as challenging.